Taj Mahal and my Bobo Lovelies.

Agra and the Taj Mahal were quite the experience. Here are some pictures from the weekend. Enjoy!

We cannot ask children to do things we ourselves refuse to do.

           This includes taking risks, following your dreams and most importantly following your heart. I’ve realized that much of what I want for these kids, I’ve only thought about for myself. How can I ask of them something I don’t ask of myself? It’s easy to say these things, but if you really think about it, how many of you have actually taken a risk recently? I think we become content in the safe zones that are our lives and we forget to follow our dreams in fear that we will fail. If there’s one thing I’ve learned since working with the students, it’s that life comes down to doing what makes you happy because at the end of the day, there are so many things around us that we cannot control nor will we ever be able to control them. We have to be happy spending time with the people in our lives, even if that time is spent working on math or writing. We have to find the beauty in being able to share meals with others. We have to appreciate the opportunities given to us and continue to work towards even better ones. We have to be happy in order to keep fighting for the things we want most in life.

            

            I’ve truly been changed because of these students. I feel as though every challenge and rough patch I’ve gone through here as well as in my past, was a way for me to appreciate the amazing things in my life- big and small. Being here has opened my eyes to the lives we don’t see everyday and the difficult circumstances they must live in. And even though all these things happen, the people I have met never fail to smile at me when I smile and say hello. I’m sure many of the students I have worked with could think of a million reasons why not to smile, but the fact that they are willing to come to school and work towards a brighter future shows that they are choosing to have a reason to be happy instead. They are learning that they have potential much greater than they had ever known before. I feel blessed to have seen them finally believe in this and themselves.

            

            Today was my last day at the school and I don’t think I’ve ever had to do anything more difficult in my life than walk away after saying my good-byes. Raju, the young man that I’ve grown closest to, gave me a hug just as I was walking to the car. The people here don’t hug. It’s more a custom to shake hands and that is all. Me being me wanted to hug everyone, but I remembered the last time I thought of doing that one of the students got super stiff. Since then, I’ve kept to hand shakes. It warmed my heart when he hugged me because it was one of the moments where neither of us needed to say anything, but we both knew what we were feeling and thinking. These past few days Raju shared with me more of his hopes and secrets than I could’ve ever imagined. The same way he began to trust me, my heart began to make a special place in it for him. I often keep people at a distance for some time before I allow them in, but with Raju the moment came sooner than any other person in my life. He inspires me to take the risks I encourage him to take in his life. He has taught me so much in such a small amount of time. I believe God put us each in one another’s life this summer for a very important reason. I can finish and leave this project knowing that I have impacted someone’s life.

Below are some pictures from the artwork now displayed in the school house, the COMPLETED library,students finishing their last photo project, some of the younger students in the park and some of the wonderful people I’ve been blessed to work with.

Ram, Devender and Manoj

Devender

Library (over 600 books indexed and labelled!)

Art Exhibit- July 15, 2011

 All original student work

Assembly.

Finished drawings.

<3

Walter!

Left- Sunita Ma'am (librarian) Right- Monica Ma'am (Hindi Teacher)

Terrorist Bombing in Mumbai 7/13/2011

Check out these links. It’s pretty disturbing, so beware. It’s really insane to be in India while all this is happening. My prayers are with the family members who have lost loved ones and for those who are fighting for their lives.

Aftermath

Updates and Details. 

Food for thought.

I think you should all check out this article:
Preventing Underage Marriage

I'm curious, what do you all think? What would it take for an entire country to move towards the desired outcomes?

Reflections and Motocycle babes!?

           What do you do when one of the students asks, “What do I need to do to get a passport so that I can go to America?” Maybe you don’t see anything wrong with this question, but for me, it comes with a lot of emotional hardship. One of the students wanted to have a conversation about the kinds of jobs he could get in America as a teenager and what the necessary steps to go to school would be. While I was excited that he was thinking about school, I was also overcome with sadness. For many of the students, completing basic school will be the hardest challenge they face. With pressure from home to work, pressure from others to go down the wrong path, arranged marriage and many other factors, it will be rare to accomplish more than school. When I write this, it sounds very negative and pessimist of me, however, I’m mostly being honest about the realities they face. I wish more than anything that the students I work with excel in every aspect of life and get to a point where they have broken the vicious cycle that is in place for the poor people in India. So when Raju wanted to discuss making it out and living in America, I couldn’t help but feel pain: pain at the idea of him having all these amazing dreams, but having everything work against him and ultimately failing. I’ve spent so much time with the students talking about my college experience and how important it is for them to finish school, that I felt guilty for a moment; like maybe my presence was doing more harm than good. Would Raju be thinking about going to America if I had not come and planted all these wonderful ideas in his mind? Yes, some might say that it’s good to plant ideas of finishing school and the importance of education. And to that, I would agree 100%. I guess more of my concern and pain comes from them having goals they cannot reach. I hate to say that because others have always told me that I can do anything and that nothing is out of reach. I’m not saying I don’t believe in them, because trust me, I do. I think that’s why I feel so much pain and hurt for them. I don’t want them to fail and even more than that, I don’t want them to feel the pain that comes with failure. I guess I know what teachers feel like in different realms of schooling.

            

               So after talking this out and crying a bit to my brother, he brought up some good/heavy questions for me to think about. I’ve planned to continue this kind of work as a career, so he asked me, “Can I do this over and over again?” Before coming here I thought without a doubt that this work was where I belong. And while I still believe that, I’m starting to realize it’s a bigger emotional rollercoaster than I had prepared for. Sure you can always adjust to the culture of where you’re staying, but can you ever really get use to the emotional attachment that comes along with working with so many incredible people? It’s something I’m going to have to spend the rest of my time at Bowdoin thinking about. I also recognize that me being here is not in any way a waste of time. The same brother of mine also reaffirmed that my love for the students has been worth more than the photo skills I’ve given them or the typing skills they’ve learned. I know when I was in high school going through my own obstacles, the people who showered me with love and spent time with me, were the people to make the biggest impact in my life. I will never forget that, and now I know that it’s the one thing I’m hoping the students never forget as well. I also had help from a fellow volunteer and he told me something absolutely beautiful. He said, “ You being here is something I call a ‘privilege’. The things we think about as privileges in the states (money, property, etc) aren’t anything compared to the privilege of seeing the world in a real way. You being here this summer is a way to experience the world not many are not fortunate to have”. Wow, what a great way to look at things. I may leave this place, but this experience will never leave me.

            

             On a lighter note, I rode on the back of a motorcycle today! I know my brother didn’t want me doing that, but I had to because my auto was a no show, so Dr. B. sent the motorcycle. I didn’t have a helmet, so I was nervous and scared at the beginning, but then after a while I let my hair down and enjoyed the ride. I thought I got stares before, but it seemed like me on a bike with this young man (who I might add was a handsome gent) was a bigger deal than just me in a rickshaw. I know it was dangerous, but I was actually really excited I got the experience :D  

India

           has taught me so much about the Indian culture versus what Americans think is the Indian culture, more about my personal strength and millions about who my true friends are. It’s amazing all the things you learn being in a different country, away from all those people. I’m surprised by how much I’ve changed as well and the types of changes I’m going to make in my life when I return home. I feel rooted in the person I am and will become. Before, I was afraid of letting go of people and of ideas, but now I feel confident that each new lesson I am learning/taking back is going to benefit me so much. I can’t wait to meet new challenges and spend time with the people who have proven to be worth my friendship. Yay for my Eat. Pray. Love moments :D

Series of Unfortunate Events.

            Men here really don’t appreciate being lectured or told what to do by women. My rickshaw driver is the perfect example of this. Last week, my Dr. Savita discussed with him the need for him to be on time when picking me up to come to and from school. I know he was going to have a problem with being scolded by a woman because immediately during their talk he started to get loud to the point where he was almost yelling. Dr. Savita being the amazingly strong woman she is, shot him down quickly and made her point clear that he needed to be a more responsible driver. Well, during that ride post conversation, he drove like a crazy man! As if the roads here weren’t bad enough, he took turns and speed bumps like they didn’t exist. It was so terrible that during one of the bumps, the back of the auto went up so badly it made my head hit the roof of the auto. I wish this was the worst of it, but my head came down to meet my laptop sitting upright in my lap, resulting in me biting my lip very severely. I was bleeding for about 5 minutes and spitting out blood for the rest of the ride home. When the other volunteers asked him to be more careful, he just shrugged and kept going. It was really painful and made me so frustrated. When we finally got home, all I wanted to do was get out of the auto and get water for my mouth, but of course this man insisted on me getting water for him from the house. This is typical for drivers to ask for water, but I was already too angry at the whole situation I did not want to be serving this guy water. While I wanted to just walk away, I took a deep breath, grabbed him water and finally walked away. My tongue was swollen and made it impossible for me to eat anything. I also sounded like a person who had just eaten something they were allergic too (i.e. Will Smith in the Movie Hitch).

           

         I hoped the next week would be better. Of course, not to my surprise he again was a reckless, inconsiderate driver who made me feel really uncomfortable. Monday after class was the final straw for this guy as my driver, when he refused to pick up the little sister to one of the girls in the auto with me that I offered to catch a ride with me since we were all going to the same sector, I just had it. He had no reason to say no since the sister was already in the auto going to the same location as the younger one would have been as well as there was enough space in the auto for one more, tiny girl. I tried explaining to him that it made no sense for him not to stop, but he kept waving his hand in my face and blowing me off. On top of that, he doesn’t speak English very well, if at all really, and so we’re just arguing in different languages at the end of the day. Of course I call Dr. B requesting a new driver and what does he say? He says, “ Tell me what the issues are so we can sort it out. It’s too much work for me to find another driver”. HELLO, IT’S YOUR JOB! “too much work”?! You have got to be kidding me. After I explained everything that had happened, he still insisted I use the same driver and that I wasn’t going to get a driver who could speak English because it’s India- “nobody speaks English”. Yeah, this guy is almost as bad as the driver. Finally after staying firm in requesting a new driver, he agreed to find me another. We’ll see tomorrow at 9 a.m. if this driver shows up. (oh and just another note, the bad driver lied to Dr. B and said he picked me up today after school. I had to find another way back to the hostel)

            

               Maybe all these events get to me even more because I haven’t been sleeping much here. It’s way too hot and I’m constantly uncomfortable to the point where I lay in bed trying to sleep for a solid 2 hrs before I actually fall asleep and wake up earlier than needed because it’s too difficult to stay asleep. Last night I think was the worst of all though. The electricity in the entire sector was off. Usually there are generators that keep a select few lights/fans on, but last night those were out as well. So, it was almost 100 degrees at midnight, I couldn’t sleep and there was the most annoying dog outside barking. I wanted to go out there and shut the thing up, but we all know I don’t have that in me AND Devender had just given me wrist thread earlier in the day that is suppose to keep me on the right track. That dog got lucky, in my opinion ;D I think all the students had a rough night because of the heat. I could see today in class they all moved a little slower and were a bit more calm than usual. The heat has been absolutely crushing. I’m trying my best to stay hydrated and in good spirits. I know how easily it can be to become frustrated and unenthusiastic about daily routines. Despite the heat, the students had a great time making the letters of the alphabet out of their bodies! (Special thanks to Janice for the idea) They were super creative and got through the alphabet with no problems. They took a lot of photos, so I’m just going to post my favorite interpretation of the letter ‘D’. These kids never cease to amaze! 

thread that keeps me on the right path :D